- NOT EVERYONE WHO FINDS SOUGHT
- THE PROBLEM OF REAL MEN
- THE CAUSE
- INITIATING /= PURSUING /= LEADING
- LADIES TO PURSUE
- PURSUING, LEADING, AND SUBMISSION
- LOVE STORY AN ORCHESTRA
It may be a deviant thing for us (as I am living in the Philippines, and that ladies here are really meant to just wait to be pursued, as this country seems to be “conservative”), and I guess this is brought by our culture and tradition. Even in Biblical times, the man is meant to seek a woman who should be coming from their own tribe, and a woman should only wait, since the man is the one who would provide in the household, and women are meant to stay inside the house. Thus, the guy gets to have the privilege to choose who to marry.
Moreover, the feeling to be pursued, which most of the girls cannot deny, is really pleasing. It’s something that’s innate in us, like our biological sex. We wanted to have a man who would serve us and our family, who would make us feel special, and surprise us in special occasions. Maybe this picture has been inherited even from the when Abraham sought Rebecca for his son Isaac, or when Jacob served Rachel’s family to have her his wife. What a dreamy love story for mostly of the ladies.
We also cannot deny the fact that women really has different temperaments compared to the guys (if we could only find an expected value to measure the degree of our personalities in general). Nowadays, guys have to guess what ladies are feeling, and ladies are very (or sometimes, acting to be) unpredictable, and would even make the guys pursue and wait for months or years before they would decide to be in a relationship. As for the men on the other hand, I cannot tell. Personalities and temperaments should choose no gender but because of the influence of the olden time’s patriarchal society, men are seen to be, or expected to be the one who should always initiate, and be straightforward. Even though this doesn’t always happen, this is what we commonly see, be it in reality or in movies, which are sometimes based on realities.
It is the norm. And should ladies pursue, that would be like rowing against the current.