Is it wrong for a Christian lady to pursue a guy?

Contents:

1. INTRODUCTION
2. NOT EVERYONE WHO FINDS SOUGHT
3. THE PROBLEM OF REAL MEN
4. THE CAUSE
5. INITIATING /= PURSUING /= LEADING
6. LADIES TO PURSUE
   • The Context
   • How can it happen?
7. PURSUING, LEADING, AND SUBMISSION
8. LOVE STORY AN ORCHESTRA

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THE PROBLEM OF REAL MEN

What does really “man up” mean? Are all who pursued considered the “real” guys?

I clearly do not know if we can box up the properties and personalities of which we call real guys. If we look at some couples today, I doubt all wives could even say their husband has been a real guy during the pursuit and courtship.

For example, you can say a guy who mans up is the one who pursued a lady who has achieved more (let’s say in a certain career) and wants a guy of her level, or a guy who has no talent at all but braved himself to seek a woman’s heart who desired to have a guy with a full package, and a pretty face too. Yeah they may look like what we see as real men since they’re pursuing who they believe they love (following their heart’s desires); they’re brave men after all. Yet in some situations like this, others consider those as absurdity and that not all of the guys are being real at all. There are situations that some guys already know that they don’t even stand a chance, so what’s the point of the pursuit? If they just did it because they wanna be seen as brave, and/or they’re acting by impulse, then some can say they aren’t being ‘real’ at all. Some also might think, maybe God would change that woman’s heart. I personally do not know for sure, but that’s a possibility. Lastly, for some, which includes me, a real man would seek wisdom and the right timing from the Lord when should he pursue and when he should still wait.

Well, those are only for the sake of having an illustration that we cannot fix such definition to a real guy. And those appearances and physical aspects mentioned above are only small things that we should look the least into someone we want to be with in marriage.

Besides, we all know that not all relationship we can find in this world, even in the smaller set of Christian couples, are initiated by the man and not by the woman. So can we say then that those men who did not initiate the relationship aren’t real men? I, personally, don’t think so.

Given the absence of an absolute definition, we cannot fully trust and expect all men, who are bound to get married, to man up (whatever that means) and pursue.